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Five Years Separated, Now I Want my house. (6 Posts)
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11 October, 2017 02:19AM
Five Years Separated, Now I Want my house.
B0B - 11 October, 2017 02:19AM
It's coming up to 5 years since I left my wife. She is still in the family home with my two children aged 21 and 18. Both are in full time education.

I'm keeping up with the mortgage payments, but struggling to move on. I can't afford to buy or rent a new place.

Can I force my ex to move out? If she did move out, would I have to pay anything monthly? Would I get half the profit on the house when it's sold?

I'm thinking of just going to a solicitor and just saying deal with it, I want my money and I want a divorce. Is this likely to be expensive?

Re: Five Years Separated, Now I Want my house.
HatMan - 11 October, 2017 05:50AM
Why on earth do you imagine that you can force her to move out ? - From what you say she still has dependent children at home - highly likely that until they cease education you have responsibility, would probably be wise to start to formalise the situation re divorce though....starting point for settlement will be 50/50 of all assets - unless either party can show greater need...eg if your wife has much lower earning ability.
Re: Five Years Separated, Now I Want my house.
davidterry - 11 October, 2017 11:48AM
Although it would be sensible to seek a divorce it is not such a good idea just to leave everything to a solicitor unless you have money to burn. The fact is that if you and your wife can agree the terms of any financial settlement between you that is the single most important thing you can do to keep expense down.

Sorting the finances out comes second to the divorce though. You need to issue a divorce petition first. That will concentrate your wife's mind more than anything on getting the finances settled. At the moment she has no particular incentive to do anything because you are paying the mortgage.

How finances pan out very much depends upon the detail such as the value of the house, the size of the outstanding mortgage, your respective earnings etc. But the first step is to get a divorce going.
Re: Five Years Separated, Now I Want my house.
B0B - 11 October, 2017 06:42PM
Thanks for the replies.

'Force her out'.. strong words. Obviously I wouldn't force out my children, but it's a large house and she/they've been there nearly five years. 'Encourage' her to find somewhere smaller and cheaper should be my way forward I think.

I think I've been looking at things the wrong way. Divorce seems to me to be the final step. when finances have been sorted out. I didn't really think you could get a divorce when there's still details outstanding such as sale of house and division of funds.

My new partner is desperate for me to be divorced (understandably!) not least as she isn't in the best of health and doesn't want to leave her house to me as she thinks my ex will be able to claim part of it's value? Surely it's not part of the marital assets?
Re: Five Years Separated, Now I Want my house.
davidterry - 12 October, 2017 08:50AM
>>Divorce seems to me to be the final step. when finances have been sorted out.

You are wrong because outside of divorce there is no way of progressing financial issues. You just end up going round and round in circles. Within the context of a divorce there are procedures available by which financial issues can be progressed and knowing that concentrates minds wonderfully. Also, if you were to reach agreement before divorce there is usually be nothing to prevent one spouse or the other coming back and asking for more in the divorce. Within the context of a divorce any agreement can be progressed and made final. It is the divorce which comes first or, at least, the issue of divorce proceedings.
Re: Five Years Separated, Now I Want my house.
B0B - 12 October, 2017 08:34PM
What a great post, davidterry, things are gettng clearer thumbs up

Thank You
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