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History: Home UK Divorce Forum
Consider divorce. Sincerely need some advice (5 Posts)
Started By:
03 October, 2017 09:18PM
Consider divorce. Sincerely need some advice
Johngrace11 - 03 October, 2017 09:18PM
I have married for several years. I am a British citizen and my wife is a dependent of mine (she is on the spouse visa).

Since one and a half years ago, my wife has lost interests in the family. She no longer cares about our daughter or me. She could disappear for several weeks without a reason. I am now sincerely considering ending this marriage. The end of the marriage will not be good for our child. But the current situation is not making any good either and will probably make more harm if we split in the future as our daughter will grow older and know more.

I have a few questions and would appreciate any advice or suggestion.

1. What will happen to our house and savings? I had a house under my name and some savings before the marriage. After the marriage, I sold the old house and bought a bigger house. I also put in all my savings towards purchasing the new house and my parents also made a gift to me to help with the deposit. She made no financial contribution at all towards the purchase of the new house. The mortgage was considered at the time just based on my income as the bank didn't want to consider her income as she is always doing temporary contract jobs.

I guess what are not looking good to my side are: i). Her name is also on the mortgage ii). The house was bought as joint tenancy which didn't reflect I was the one who put in all the deposit.

2. My parents gifted me some money from time to time as they would like us to invest on their granddaughter. But once my wife had the money, she just spent it all on her stuffs. I guess I could save the gifted money secretly and don't tell my wife. But my concern is that if I split with my wife in the future. Does it mean I will need to split the saving towards my daughter's future and gave her 50%? Junior-ISA will not be a good option as it will lock the money till my daughter's 18th birthday. That will limit me on how and when I can spend the money on my daughter. I may be thinking very naively. But is there a way that I can protect the gifted money from my parents from my wife misusing it. Can I be the sole decision maker on how to use these money? If I can, what should I do?

I know I need to talk to a divorce lawyer and I will be talking to one. But since my case has lots of financial elements and money issues in it, do I need to see a divorce lawyer with specific expertise? Or will any divorce lawyer be able to advise on the issues above in good depth?

Thank you.
Re: Consider divorce. Sincerely need some advice
Andyk - 04 October, 2017 07:48AM
You say you have been married for several years, if this is a long marriage the the starting point for any split would usually be 50/50, as there is a dependent child then whoever ends up with primary care of the child would generally be able to argue for a greater share of the pot as the needs of the child will come first.

Generally you can forget about the fact that you paid the deposit, paid the mortgage or anything like that if this is a long marriage, youmight only be able to ring fence this is there is enough money in the pot to house your wife and child outright. As for the money gifted to you by your parents, it was just that, a gift and would be considered as part of the pot. if they wanted it back then they should have formally made it a loan to you.
Re: Consider divorce. Sincerely need some advice
davidterry - 04 October, 2017 09:59AM
Just ask your parents not to gift you any more money until you have obtained a divorce and settled financial issues between yourself and your wife once for all within the context of that divorce.
Re: Consider divorce. Sincerely need some advice
Ragini44 - 10 October, 2017 11:49AM
Try to settle everything you and your wife. Good luck!
Re: Consider divorce. Sincerely need some advice
KenPatrick - 17 November, 2017 11:29AM
Best is for you to moving anyway. If you can't then you can, in any case, to isolate by having detached lives from a similar home.
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