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History: Home UK Divorce Forum
Topic:
Shared Care Arrangement (2 Posts)
Started By:
Date:
08 January, 2017 05:39PM
Shared Care Arrangement
boyce57 - 08 January, 2017 05:39PM
Hi my wife and I are separated.



She moved out the family home into a rental with another guy she claims was a friend but they are now in a relationship. On a number of occasions we have agreed dates between us but she has not returned the children to me and I can't just forcefully take them from her house. She is also now dictating when I have them and although i know i could equally do the same, and even though she had them this week for a short holiday I had them last night and just reluctantly returned them to her even though I should be taking care of them this week as that would be fair.



Should I allow her to control the arrangements and then use her selfish attitude with the children against her when things go to court? Or should I play her at her own game?
Re: Shared Care Arrangement
davidterry - 10 January, 2017 07:10PM
Playing her at her own game is a mug's game. The best way to get good quality contact with children is by trying to maintain a good working relationship with the parent who has day to day care of the children. That isn't necessarily easy and it often does not happen overnight but in the long run that is what works best.

Looking after children on your own is hard work so often what works well is indifference. If your wife sees that it does not get to you then the children are less likely to be used as tools against you and you stand a better chance in the long run of having good quality contact.
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